Overthinking Will Chase Away Your Forever Person
Overthinking Will Chase Away Your Forever Person
Overthinking
will ruin your relationship, because it means you are not talking to
each other. It means you are assuming what your person meant when they
sent a certain text or used a certain tone. It means that instead of
feeling comfortable enough to ask them a question to get clarification,
you are choosing to guess what has been running through their mind to
avoid a conversation.
Overthinking
will chase away your forever person because it makes it look like you
think the worst of them. You are probably paranoid due to your own insecurities,
but it doesn’t seem that way from their point of view. If you are
worried they are cheating every time they come home late and worried
they are making fun of you every time they smile at their phone — then
it looks like you don’t trust them. It looks like you think they are
heartless and willing to hurting you.
If this person really is your forever,
then you should be able to talk to them. You should feel comfortable
sitting them down and having an adult discussion. If they are the right
person for you, they are not going to be turned off by hearing about
your feelings. They will want to know what has been bothering you. They
will be happy to answer any questions that have been nagging you.
You need to talk to your person, because
if you keep guessing what they are thinking, half of the time you are
going to be wrong. Half of the time you are going to stress yourself out
over a problem that does not even exist. Half of the time you are going
to make your life harder than it has to be — and you could ruin your
relationship in the process.
Think about it. When you have a fake
argument with them in your head because you are convinced they did
something to upset you, how do you react? You get quiet. Or snippy. Or
defensive. Or angry. And your person has no idea why you are feeling
that way, so they react in anger and then you’re suddenly in a fight
about nothing.
The healthy move is to communicate
with your person. If they say something that sounds suspicious, ask
them what they meant. If they come home late and you have questions, ask
them. You will be surprised by how many of your worries vanish once you
create an open discussion.
You cannot keep letting yourself overthink
because you are driving yourself insane for no reason. Instead of
jumping to the worst case scenario, take a breather and ask your person
about what has been bugging you. If they are your soulmate like you
think they are, then they will be happy to clear everything up. They
will be happy to calm your fears.
And if you’re dating the kind of person
who fuels your paranoia, who refuses to answer questions and jumps down
your throat whenever you express emotion, leave. You are in the wrong
relationship anyway.
~GURNOOR
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